Of Course This Would Happen

I'm still on the New Years train with my posts. Haven't really fully taken the dive into 2021 just yet.

Imagine. Take yourself back to New Years Day 2021. You're preparing your black eyed peas and greens because you want to set yourself up for health and wealth in the new year. It's not something to joke about for sure. It must be done. You decide to go crockpot this year. You have no idea why, and you're not really able to stand on solid ground and support this decision. You do it anyways. You get all of the fixins into the crock and you crank up the heat. Crank it way up - those black eyed peas are not going to cook themselves. Everything is going great. You may have started 3 hours after you planned, but the Goddesses of the Universe are aligning and you are owning your moment. Take a break, listen to some music and eat a cookie - you've earned it. 

Not one to completely abandon your responsibilities, you circle back around for your first stir-and-sniff about 20 minutes in, and the plan is forever changed. You go for it, and all of a sudden what was one is now two. Connected no more. Separated by time and space. You know the old* saying "they go together like a handle and a lid"? (old* - adj. meaning existing for 30 seconds, because I clearly just made it up). Well let me tell you what- that was no longer my reality. What you see pictured below is how I found myself just 20 minutes into what I thought would be a two-hour ordeal that obviously turned into a 7-hour ordeal because I didn't do my homework. 

 Below, a reenactment that gets a little out of hand. 

                                  

This video may not be highlighting the part of the story I was hoping to expose (no need to worry about the white film lining the interior that may have caught your eye. I obviously would never ever have prepared any food when it looked like that). Did you hear the drop? That was a first - I was attempting to show more of a lid-dropping-in-peas-food-splashing-everywhere situation, which more aligned with my authentic experience. On account of the close call/near droppage in the reenactment, you'll have to use your mind completely and will unfortunately not be getting any accompanying video footage. 

Reflexes on point. I saved myself from the shatter, but only just barely. #whew 

Did You Eat Your Black Eyed Peas and Greens?

Well, I really hope you did. They have absolutely everything on my list going for them:

• easy
• cheap
• delicious
• SET YOU UP FOR HEALTH AND WEALTH IN THE NEW YEAR 

 

I did something for the first time this year and invited some folks over for grab-and-go black eyed peas, because it is not the year to be taking any chances with health and wealth you know. What I also did for the first time was use a crockpot. When I was getting my timelines ready and checking in with Sandy about the plans, I certainly didn't mention the crockpot thing. So you know, planning for 4:00 pm prep-time and 7 pm serve-time over here. MMMMM  ✂ 2 people on their way and the BEPS just ain't ready. They are nothing but light little babies in the crock looking hard. 

The internet tells me I can microwave them, even HEB. Sandy tells me I can't.

Since she knows I'm obviously going to try the microwave approach, she casually suggests a test. A small amount of peas for 30 seconds. The woman is wise what can I say. 10 seconds in to the test it's like popcorn. If I hadn't been standing right there I would have landed in Home Alone Keep Tha Change Ya Filthy Animals Fireworks In A Pot sounds and debris territory. 

You know, a second suggestion to help my dumbass out.

So, I tried to salvage this but there quite literally was just not enough time. People came and went. Took their black eyed peas and ate them. Not as flavorful as one might expect and sometimes you know you really gotta use your teeth to bite into it 🤷.

I turned the crockpot off after 11 that night, and let me tell you, those fully cooked black eyed peas were deeeeelicious. 

You know, I had to try and make this right...

Why are we looking at this house and why is the window circled?

?

See it yet?

Bahahahahahhahhahhahahah.
A #tupperwareBEPdrop #january2ndsurprise #yougottatrythisfullycooked

On account of the open window (and the fact that I hadn't confirmed this was still the residence) I only sneaked a pic from the other side of the street and in my car instead of living out the full-blown #bepdrop photoshoot of my dreams.

Post-drop, residence was confirmed. Not only was health and wealth procured by getting those black eyed peas and collared greens in on New Years Dayyyy, they got to actually enjoy them fully cooked on Jan 2 🥬💜. 

The Bridge, Aka Connection from That to This

Omg I Used to be Funny.

Errmmmmmmmmmm I found myself lost in the nostalgia of this GEM today (don't worry, it will auto-open in a new tab for ya, because I care). I'm not gonna lie to you, I was pretty funny. This got me going, and now here we are. Ya welcome.

Just in case you weren't seduced by the option to click out to an entire chapter of my life abroad above, here are some pics that snagged my attention. Quality content if you ask me. 

I'll thought I would go most recent on back (lol, most recent aka March 2010), but I had to go with a real shining star of a starter pic, and then I follow up in descending chronological order with some of my personal highlights from March 2010 to March 2009.

Shining star 🌟🌟🌟. 

And ya girl turns 24.

Madam!!!! It was true love from Day 1.

Bahahaha, when it comes to movies, I know my roots. I'm not sure how I got so lucky to have carried this movie with me from Day 1, but she def still makes appearances today. "Cute baby, boy or girl? WELL GOSH I HOPE SO". #classic

If interested - Back to The Beach is also where it's at. And easier to find online in 2021 than the absolute treasure pictured above. I tried to rent this bia in 2020 from a video store (how would I have even watched it, I mean honestly) due to the level of difficultly of online viewing. However, I did not give up. And when you don't give up until you've succeeded, well at some point you succeed and you get to stream Undercover Blues from the comfort of your home in 2020. Obviously hoping for a repeat shortly (like tonite), but that kind of lightening doesn't always strike twice. If the opportunity were to present itself to you, I would 10/10 recommend an Undercover Blues/Back to the Beach double feature. If you don't laugh I just, I just don't know what to say. 

Smokin a hand-rolled cig folks. That's ya girl.

I meannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn #classic.

A truly inspirational literarian.

Cyyyuuuttttttteeeeeee lewk my darling.

Mmmhmmm. More of me looking amaze.

Pretty prettty pretty great day.